finally

I do not resolve. There is nothing I want to resolve, really, except to continue to think things through as they happen so that I understand others and myself better. Which is not a resolution so much as a way of living one's life.

I could resolve to blog more, but I won't. I don't want to. I mean, I'd be happy if I blogged more, but I don't want to resolve it. 

Apparently I just hate the idea of making resolutions. I especially hate the idea of making resolutions on demand at the beginning of the year. This is the worst possible time to resolve anything. It is cold. It is damp. The days are short. One just wants to hibernate, not do things. 

Most years, I don't think the changing from one year to another means much. We arbitrarily made up a calendar (albeit based on some physical phenomena) and chose a day to change things over. It doesn't actually mean anything except, as D. reminded me, that we have circled the sun once since the last time we proclaimed a new year. This year, though I need the symbolism of the change. I need something to tell me that 2014 is over. It is finally, finally over. Finally.

So, no resolutions. Instead, I am just going to LIVE. I really hope that 2015 will be better than 2014 - if it is worse, I give up now - and I want to enjoy it. Now that I know that things can be as awful as they were in 2014, I have a whole new appreciation for not-2014. 

We'll see how it goes, starting tomorrow, when I head off to my new job. (New job! I am so excited!)