panic, panic, panic

i have this terrified feeling in my stomach about all that must be done before friday at 3, when i leave this apartment for the airport (LESS THAN THREE DAYS). i'm never going to get through it all, never. plus this admin exam tomorrow morning, which i don't care about much because it's the end of the year (my whole apartment watched will & grace instead of studying tonight), but it's another thing to do. then the whole list of things to do, the whole list, the whole list.

i'm trying to remember that at the end of it all is a sunny plateau in central africa and a drive down one of my favorite roads in the entire world to one of my favorite towns in the entire world: kibuye, rwanda, where, yes, i'm going to have a chance to rest. a little bit. before i have to start the writing competition brief to be on a journal next year (sigh). and immediately after that, i have to start thinking about the rest: buying a plane ticket to arusha, getting presents to the people i'm supposed to give them to... wait a second. presents. i'm supposed to have presents for people and i DON'T. blast. and no time to buy them.

okay, bed. better than worrying. admin will take care of itself and then i'll be a 2L. then i'll pack and move and fly and sleep, in that order.